Beginning of the world
The beginning of the world included the time that follows the life of Franco DePatchio and tells of what happened to him when he, the creator of the world, was determining what in the world should be what, but this article falls short of the beginning of the next article ("The early world") which tells of what happened following Franco DePatchio's death. So yeah, this just tells of about half his life. For the other half, please see: Before the beginning of the world. What was most important to him What was most important to him, of course, went first, so Franco created cheese, milkshakes, chocolate, and ice-tea first. This likely explains why all this stuff is only eaten by old people, signifying that the are all old (or whatever; it still makes perfect sense). Issues There were a whole lotta issues that resulted from “what was important to him” as going first, because he was going by the “How to Create the World for Dummies” handbook that he'd bought at Borders in the Mall, so he had some issues that resulted from that, as explained earlier in this sentence. Also, when he was checking his MySpace messages, the majority of them were requests on what he should add into the world that he was going to create at some point in time (he was holding it off/procrastinating because he was lazy). Some of the requests included “Can you make laptops more affordable?” or “Can you stop school from being mandatory?” or “Can you get me hooked up with some hot chick?” and he felt like God for a second there, receiving all those MySpace emails. It seemed that if he ever posted a bulletin, there'd be a ton of comments asking about it, even if it was something simple like “I ate a dolphin at Long John Silvers today”, which sounds more like a tweet instead of a MySpace bulletin, but whatever. He was having trouble deciding on what to create for the world, because it was just so complicated to him, so he thought and he thought and he thought and he said, “think, think, think, poo bear” and then he said, “Alright, I'm definitely putting 'Winnie the Poo' on my 'List of cartoons I need to cancel'.” Assassination attempt Eventually, he made a public announcement in front of billions of people (it was even broadcasted all over the world) that he would begin his creation of the world, and then everyone cheered and clapped and cheered again and then clapped again and other crap like that. But then there was an assassination attempt at the assembly and he was almost shot in the leg, but then his bodyguard, Weevey (that was actually his name, I'm not joking around with you) simply caught the bullet in his hand and threw it all the way across the crowd with so much force that it disintegrated the air around it, leaving space in which air didn't occupy, due to the fact that air is racist and tends to want to only be in its own social groups and so thus doesn't want to interact with other air particles, due to the fact that air particles are racist of other air particles, as stated earlier. After the attempt So yeah, the assassination attempt didn't work. And Franco was scared, too. So scared that he screamed like a little girl in public and so his social status just dropped so much that everyone started giving him hate comments when he was checking the YouTube videos that he had been uploading in support of his favorite band, Slipknot. So yeah, when he started writing down prewriting steps to “how this was gonna go”, he was arrested many times, the first time from speeding of 160 miles per hour on the highway and running over two coffee cups which were sporadically in Franco's way while driving, mysteriously. So the cop first gave him a ticket, but eventually simply took the keys to his car and threw them off a cliff, saying “that's how we suspend your license in Egypt” and then Franco's like “Wtf I can totally just get another car. I mean seriously, how hard would that be. I have another car at my house.” And then the cop, who was already furious with Franco, simply said, “Grr....yo momma is so fat that she eats hamburgers!” and then Franco's like “wtf?” and then the cop pulls out a gun and then Franco pulls out a chaingun and says “you'd better watch it. I used this on Doom, the PC game, and I know what it does.” And the cop backed off the cliff they were standing near, and Franco was put in jail for three years, which quickly angered the public in slowing down the “Creation of the World Project”, which eventually resulted in the Japanese armed forces blowing up the prison that Franco was in, resulting in a Japanese-American war that lasted seventy-five centuries; the Japanese like water. And when the prison blew up, Franco was credited as being the cause for it, and so he sentenced another fifty years in prison, which resulted in the explosion of that prison, too, which resulted in him getting life in prison. The girl of his dreams During spending prison time at the prison he was spending time at, he met a very “beautiful”, as he called it, girl, that was serving time for killing three hundred people with a machine gun. You may ask how this ties in with the creation of the world? Well, really, it just sparked his enthusiasm and creationism for doing it, so she was essential in his needs for emotional stability. However, when he asked her to marry him, she refused and slapped him across the face, which plummeted any chances for the world being created (yet again). Getting out of prison (or whatever) How Franco got out of prison was he threatened to make everyone at the prison drink Pepsi Max. Everyone knew that Pepsi was bad enough by itself, but just by adding the word “Max” after it makes it sound so much worse. The entire prison was abandoned and Franco reached another issue. The prison was abandoned but he was still in his cell. And it was locked. Friggin locked. LOCKED. The keys were too far away for him to be able to reach them, and then suddenly, Regis Philbin shows up out of nowhere and says, “Hello, would you like to be a millionaire?” and then Franco says, “Are you....God?” Regis says, “What? No, I'm not God, stupid. I'm Regis Philbin. You know, from the game show that you bribed to get in and then said you'd sue me if I didn't let you in and then I called the security and you threatened to kill me?” Franco says, “Oh. Right. Yeah I remember you. Hey, why don't you actually be of some use and unlock me so I can escape out of my cell?” and Regis just leaves. After a few minutes, Franco says, “Well that was fucking random” to himself. Then, he found the key to opening the prison as it was laying on the floor of the prison, so he uses his mouse, Stuart Little, and gets the key to unlock the door. Then he gets out of it and walks house to work on creating the world some more. Death So instead of doing that like everybody wanted him to, he decided to simply go around town and start doing whatever he wanted, which usually revolved around eating hamburgers at McDonald's and shopping for clothes at the mall. When people asked him “to fucking hurry up already”, and had asked it “too much for him to bare”, he made a public announcement: “People of Shit town was the name of the town, I must explain that I have a life too and it does not revolve around creating the world, alright? You got that? Because I don't even wanna friggin do this anymore. It's madness. I hate it. I wanna just burn this town down with gasoline and laugh right in your dead little faces.” And then this large black man shot him fifty-seven times. You think he lived? No he did not. No way. He died. See also *Before the beginning of the world *The early world *Medieval times *The modern world